Dont Fall

Don’t let yourself fall cause it’ll never work. She’s just frontin and I don’t wanna get hurt. If I catch myself slippin I’ll just take a couple steps back Shes just gotta understand that I don’t wanna get attached. What’s the use of saying anything? Cause I know if I do I’m going to miss everything. I could just look from afar and never have to get close. I don’t even have to be emotional about it, you know the heart is where it hurts the most. But I always find myself thinking iv found the one and making the greatest mistakes that I never learn from. Even if I got a lecture about how this girl doesn’t belong in the picture I’ll still trip and fall on the line I never saw. Or didn’t care to see the words “don’t cross” never occurred to me. That’s why I say don’t let yourself fall cause it’ll never work. She’s just fontin and I don’t want to get hurt. If I catch myself slippin I’ll just take a couple steps back. Shes just gotta understand that I don’t want to get attached. I hate fightin emotions when I always fail cause I still believe in love and old fairy tales. Why did she even have to kiss me and smile at all, now I’m stuck on a girl that I barely know at all. What’s all this I’m feeling after the way she touched me that evening, I couldn’t find the meaning. I have to get a grip cause I think I’m the only one who wants a relationship. Sometimes i wish i could hand all these emotions off where’s my secretary, it’s only been a month since I met her late February. But it was all just temporary and what I felt wasn’t really necessary. I still cried when she left and my conscience won’t ever let me forget. She was gone like “let’s jet set”. That’s why I say don’t let yourself fall cause it’ll never work. She’s just frontin and I don’t want to get hurt. If I catch myself slippin I’ll just take a couple steps back. She’s just gotta understand that I don’t want to get attached. I woke up today got dressed to go on my way. She tried to pull me back to bed and i kissed her on the head. Told her I gotta leave it’s been fun and don’t worry about me. There’s parts of this story that I do t want to read. I gotta go before it starts and before I begin. Iv been here before and I know how it’s gunna end. Keep falling for your type hoping that it’ll turn out alright. So I’ll step away before I make a few decisions that won’t turn out right. And she told me “I would catch you if you fall cause we’re gunna make this work. I’m not frontin and I don’t want you to get hurt. If you catch yourself slippin I’ll always have your back. And I would understand if you don’t want to get attached. But if you never let go of the past how do you tend to the future and what’s the use of falling in love when you always try to change fates picture. Are you still going to leave? Because your heart is safe with me. It’s not gunna be another bad dream so come back here and sleep.” So I locked door and took my car keys.

True Lies

Its always an option of choices once you open the door. You can walk in, you can close it, or you can just leave it open. At some point if she said that she loved me, I couldn’t say it back, cause that would mean that I got attached. I’d smile but I’d never speak to her again…If a she told me that she missed me, I’d ignore it and tell her have a good day even though I missed her too. I couldn’t bare to miss anyone again. Even if she spilled all her feelings to me in hopes that I would feel the same way, I’d just stare without an answer. I couldn’t answer anything with the truth. I always found a way to open the door and walk in but keep my foot in the door so I wouldn’t get stuck. If it didn’t work out I would just step out and close it. My failsafe to my life. I know that if she left Id worry about her but at least I wouldn’t be a burden on her mind. I just don’t ever want to feel that pain of falling in love again.

What is it when your not in control? Is it being human? Is it being reckless? Or is that just how life is? The lesson is this; You can always answer someone without a lie and never tell the truth, but the truth will still be there lingering in your heart. So don’t be afraid to close the door behind you. It isn’t a perfect world but you’ll know when you’ve opened the right door.